My grandpa has dementia. In case anyone doesn't know, dementia is a disease that attacks the brain, and there is no known cause or cure for it. This past week, I got to spend 5 days at my grandparents house along with family from North Carolina and Arkansas. Unfortunately, the flu started to go through us. It started with my uncle, went to my cousin, then to my aunt, then hit my Pappy. I hate the flu.
Normally, while he soon forgets that it happened, Pappy can carry fluid conversations, is always cracking jokes or singing, and of course, is always asking for ice cream. =) He occasionally forgets where he is, and will sometimes forget the names and relations in our family. He always knows he knows us, but often has to ask who exactly we are. Of course, some days are worse than others.
When Pappy woke up on Sunday, my grandma, two younger cousins, and aunt were just leaving for church. He woke up dehydrated, sick, and very confused, and completely not himself. He didn't know who my uncles were and was afraid that they were trying to hurt him. They worked hard all day, fighting him each time to drink. He stayed in bed pretty much all day, miserable the whole time, so we called his doctor that night and got him Tamiflu. He and my grandma hardly slept that night, Pappy hummed and rambled the entire night. About twelve hours and two doses of Tamilflu later, we were able to get him out of the bed and at the table. My uncle Chris said the only way they got him up and eating was by telling him that it was my Granny's birthday. Three of my cousins and I went into the kitchen and ate with him. I'm not sure if he ever realized who we were, but he loves kids and he quickly began smiling, talking, and even cracking some of his old cheesy jokes. His jokes didn't have to be funny, though because just seeing our Pappy's sense of humor was enough to make us smile.
When my Granny came in from the store, Pappy lit up and started going on and on about how beautiful she is. After a while he took a nap, and then we got him up for Christmas dinner and present opening. My brother and youngest cousin had to help him. All through the night, he kept making sure he knew where his "beautiful wife" was. He gave her many hugs and after asking who a present was from and my Granny told him Santa, he said: "Well, I'd rather have you than him." This of course aroused a chorus of "awwwww!"'s from all of us.
Okay, after all of that, I'm reaching my point. My grandparents are such a beautiful example of love to me. Last week was such a roller coaster to me because for all of the struggle that Pappy's dementia has caused our family; the stress, heartache, and sadness... there's so much more love. My grandma is such an example to me, and I don't even know if she realizes it. She shows me a glimpse of my God. The patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, love, and so on that she shows to my Pappy is a stunning display of her beauty and the love of God. She gives so much of herself that the only reason there's anything left is because she is tied together though Christ. Her well never runs dry because she is so full of Him. Through the everyday trial that she has been given, she still has joy. Although I'm sure that so much of her energy is given to just getting out of the bed in the morning, she still makes everyone she comes in contact with feel special. She is one the best women you will ever meet, and the strength of God radiates from her.
Then, there's my Pappy. When you're a little girl, your dad and grandfathers set your example of what a man should be, and mine have done a wonderful job. They are your strong protectors, the first men who get your love. There's something so... heartbreaking about watching one of those strong protectors slowly become unable to even take care of himself. His sweet spirit through everything always makes me feel better. Every time I'm around him, he tells me how proud of me he is, and how much he loves me. He tells me that he prays for me, which I honestly don't doubt. He always asks me about my life, gives me hugs, and is always making sure that I'm warm enough. Even though he isn't always himself, he's still showing me what a man of God looks like. Anytime someone mentions a worry or he's watching the news, he just starts to pray. He will suddenly start to sing hymns and praise songs, and seeing him still praising God warms my heart. He such a blessing to me even though he doesn't realize it.
Finally, the rest of my family. In this trial we have grown ever stronger in Christ and as a family. We can lean on each other in this time of struggle. We have all grown so much, and their example of patience has helped me greatly. They help me to have peace with all that's happening, even if they don't realize it. They help me to enjoy the cheesy jokes, patiently answer the same questions over and over, as if they've never been asked, instead of waiting on the next time my wonderful Pappy asks me who I am. I'm learning more and more that the more times I answer a question, it just means more smiles and conversations that I will get to remember. So really, when you think about it, I may not be blessed in the common sense of the word, but I am most definitely blessed.
Normally, while he soon forgets that it happened, Pappy can carry fluid conversations, is always cracking jokes or singing, and of course, is always asking for ice cream. =) He occasionally forgets where he is, and will sometimes forget the names and relations in our family. He always knows he knows us, but often has to ask who exactly we are. Of course, some days are worse than others.
When Pappy woke up on Sunday, my grandma, two younger cousins, and aunt were just leaving for church. He woke up dehydrated, sick, and very confused, and completely not himself. He didn't know who my uncles were and was afraid that they were trying to hurt him. They worked hard all day, fighting him each time to drink. He stayed in bed pretty much all day, miserable the whole time, so we called his doctor that night and got him Tamiflu. He and my grandma hardly slept that night, Pappy hummed and rambled the entire night. About twelve hours and two doses of Tamilflu later, we were able to get him out of the bed and at the table. My uncle Chris said the only way they got him up and eating was by telling him that it was my Granny's birthday. Three of my cousins and I went into the kitchen and ate with him. I'm not sure if he ever realized who we were, but he loves kids and he quickly began smiling, talking, and even cracking some of his old cheesy jokes. His jokes didn't have to be funny, though because just seeing our Pappy's sense of humor was enough to make us smile.
When my Granny came in from the store, Pappy lit up and started going on and on about how beautiful she is. After a while he took a nap, and then we got him up for Christmas dinner and present opening. My brother and youngest cousin had to help him. All through the night, he kept making sure he knew where his "beautiful wife" was. He gave her many hugs and after asking who a present was from and my Granny told him Santa, he said: "Well, I'd rather have you than him." This of course aroused a chorus of "awwwww!"'s from all of us.
Okay, after all of that, I'm reaching my point. My grandparents are such a beautiful example of love to me. Last week was such a roller coaster to me because for all of the struggle that Pappy's dementia has caused our family; the stress, heartache, and sadness... there's so much more love. My grandma is such an example to me, and I don't even know if she realizes it. She shows me a glimpse of my God. The patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, love, and so on that she shows to my Pappy is a stunning display of her beauty and the love of God. She gives so much of herself that the only reason there's anything left is because she is tied together though Christ. Her well never runs dry because she is so full of Him. Through the everyday trial that she has been given, she still has joy. Although I'm sure that so much of her energy is given to just getting out of the bed in the morning, she still makes everyone she comes in contact with feel special. She is one the best women you will ever meet, and the strength of God radiates from her.
Then, there's my Pappy. When you're a little girl, your dad and grandfathers set your example of what a man should be, and mine have done a wonderful job. They are your strong protectors, the first men who get your love. There's something so... heartbreaking about watching one of those strong protectors slowly become unable to even take care of himself. His sweet spirit through everything always makes me feel better. Every time I'm around him, he tells me how proud of me he is, and how much he loves me. He tells me that he prays for me, which I honestly don't doubt. He always asks me about my life, gives me hugs, and is always making sure that I'm warm enough. Even though he isn't always himself, he's still showing me what a man of God looks like. Anytime someone mentions a worry or he's watching the news, he just starts to pray. He will suddenly start to sing hymns and praise songs, and seeing him still praising God warms my heart. He such a blessing to me even though he doesn't realize it.
Finally, the rest of my family. In this trial we have grown ever stronger in Christ and as a family. We can lean on each other in this time of struggle. We have all grown so much, and their example of patience has helped me greatly. They help me to have peace with all that's happening, even if they don't realize it. They help me to enjoy the cheesy jokes, patiently answer the same questions over and over, as if they've never been asked, instead of waiting on the next time my wonderful Pappy asks me who I am. I'm learning more and more that the more times I answer a question, it just means more smiles and conversations that I will get to remember. So really, when you think about it, I may not be blessed in the common sense of the word, but I am most definitely blessed.
Comments
Post a Comment